For a GREAT customer relationship, to engage is not enough; you need to think about getting married.

Think about it – good relationships are a dime a dozen (at least the way we so loosely define a good relationship these days ), but a great relationship is indeed a rare find. Now, why is that you may ask, so let’s first define a great relationship.
In my mind it is first and foremost trust as everything else is derived from that. The customer needs to feel they trust their partner/provider to buy from them and trust ladies and gentlemen takes time and effort - a commodity we cannot really seem to have much of in 2014.

I too look at my kids and think quite often how easy they have it these days. Hard work, challenges and goals seem to all compile into effortless consolation prizes or good enough grades. The smallest difficulty of asking the bus driver to change seats ends way too often by a mom terrified of her kid feel embarrassed walking up to the bus driver and dealing with it herself. Don’t get me wrong, I blame myself as well at times but man, I wish we’d push our kids harder to deal with it themselves.

Add to that the fact that moving around between jobs has become pretty much as common and as acceptable as disconnects in the middle of an AT&T call (oh I am so livid with AT&T just wait for my next post) and you tell me how can we develop trust and GREAT relationships?

However, those who do put the time, the effort, the mind and yes, their heart to it are guaranteed to succeed no matter how many jobs they go through – it is the people after all.

I mentioned in previous posts that I believe in getting personal. Let’s explore it a bit.
A few months ago I met this lady who was one of the founders of LinkedIn and she shared with me a little experiment she ran for a year. She would take a picture of EVERYONE she would meet with. The purpose in some respect was to be able to better relate to that person the next time she would communicate with them and see if it has any effect on the relationship. I didn’t read her entire research but according to her it had a huge impact on the communication. I also believe in the personal aspect of the relationship to add a layer of trust and at the bottom line add to the level of sales.

Again, going back to the time and effort and EVEN if you do move around every couple of years between jobs, think about it as promoting the brand which is YOU. The relationships and trust you build will go with you wherever you go. Just imagine the call you make when you do look for a new job or trying to sell to an old customer where you ask them about their daughter who is supposed to graduate this year (because your notes from 4 years ago show his daughter just got into college) or congratulate them for the Red-Sox going all the way (because your notes show he is a die-hard Red-Sox fan). Tell me if that person would not be that much appreciative, that much more inclined to speak/meet with you and that much interested in hearing what you have to sell.

Some of you may think now that this makes sense and maybe even a bit shallow and you are right. Of course there is more to it than just notes of important personal details and as I keep reiterating it is only part of the relationship building. And it does make sense BUT still, not enough of you out there do it.

A psychologist once told me that she got tired of her husband not getting her anything and she really needs the attention, to feel loved. So once every couple of weeks she buys a little something, wraps it, leaves it in the trunk and tells her husband to pick it up on the way up and bring her that gift “he bought her”. Make your customers, your network, your connection feel loved! Who knows, they might even love you back.

Think about it - even though facebook or skype tell your online friends and connections that it is your birthday and they send you a stupid written note (not even call you…) you are still extremely happy and appreciative when they congratulate you. It feels great (for most of us) to feel loved!

Just like my title says, engaging with the customer is no longer enough and just like in real life marriage, it takes time and effort so go ahead, put the time, make the effort and make it a GREAT relationship. And while you’re at it, take a note…my birthday is this Wednesday, March 26.